Being your authentic self - umm what’s that?
It’s self-awareness!
And, what the heck is that…
It’s just simply knowing who you are, what you believe and what truly matters to you.
“Simply”? It sounds more like some kind of abstract concept, something that we think about but never really achieve. What if I told you it’s just understanding your genuine qualities, interests and values and just being true to them in the different aspects of your life.
It’s a framework that you can use to make every decision and never have to sit in indecision and overwhelm again.
If we broke it down in to actionable steps, it would be considering and deciding what is important to YOU. It would be taking some time to question and become curiously compassionate about everything you believe. It’s looking at your “should” beliefs, your thoughts about how humans “need” to behave, your cultural norms, religious upbringing and things that were passed down from your family.
Let your self consider whether or not YOU truly believe it or if you’ve just taken things at face value and kept it. Ask yourself some questions:
When do you find yourself feeling the most alive?
Who are you with?
What kinds of activities are you participating in?
What kind of situations are you in?
What kind of situations make you feel unhappy or angry?
Who are you with?
What activities are you participating in?
Are there situations that make you feel uncomfortable?
Who are you with?
What feelings are you noticing?
In situations where you do feel authentic and connected to your true self, what’s going on?
Who are you with?
What activities are you participating in?
What are you feeling?
By asking curious questions, you can start to see a pattern and begin to understand what might need to change. You will also see what is important to you and can see patterns there as well. This will be the beginning of the framework you can rely on to use as the sounding board of your decision making process. It will apply to relationships, work situations, areas in your life where you need to have your own back, which is important to help you be decisive and not sit (or waste time) in overwhelm.
It’s important to spend time being present with yourself, challenging your self-critic, challenging your desire to avoid things, challenging your distractions, challenging your escapism like scrolling social media for hours. If you are always distracted by your negative brain chatter or avoiding situations, you can’t be aware of your present moment. Science says it takes 90 seconds for your body to process a feeling, what if we practiced allowing the feelings and being present? What if… how would your life be different?
Pause.
Breathe.
Check in with yourself regularly throughout your day, this will increase mindfulness, self-awareness and opportunities to see your authentic self in everything you do.
When you’re living an authentic life, you’re tapping into your heart!
Be kind to yourself,
Chris
